Blame it on England and Kobe

The other day a friend of mine, while congratulating me for finally getting into the world’s favorite substitute for war, wondered why the hell North America calls it “soccer” as opposed to football, which is what everyone else calls it. “What is a soccer anyway?” Well, friend, I have looked into this one. Apart from … Continue reading

The NBA Finals: Pre-Game 3 Analysises

The Boston Celtics managed a win over the Los Angeles Lakers in LA to drive the series to 1-1. Brilliant performances by Ray Allen and Rajon Rondo helped lift the Celts past the inspired play of Kobe Bryant and Pau Gasol, the gimpyness of Kevin Garnett, and the unnecessarily tight officiating of the officiators. Horrific … Continue reading

Game 2: The NBA Finals vs. Adam Sandler’s Nips

BOSTON — The NBA Finals began right under my nose. I completely missed Game 1, which probably worked out for the best. I would have been riding a high of excessive hometown pride and may have made a few stupid bets. Owing more money to unsavory con-men isn’t something I need—I already owe Verizon a … Continue reading

The One vs. The Many

Last night Kobe Bryant had an amazing game, with 38 points and 10 assists. So maybe that last sentence was a bit of an understatement. Either way, he was brilliant, but that didn’t stop the Suns from winning. How did Phoenix manage? One word (with a hyphen): back-ups. The Suns’ bench outscored the Lakers’ bench … Continue reading

Least Annoying Team of 2009: New Orleans Saints, Twins, etc…

Winner: New Orleans Saints Gotta love the Saints. Let me break it down our reasoning. In a single season, the team is successfully: (a) situating itself to become the first professional sports franchise in the history of ever to win something for the still-rebuilding Big Easy and (b) take down the man The Venuist most … Continue reading