Blame it on England and Kobe

The other day a friend of mine, while congratulating me for finally getting into the world’s favorite substitute for war, wondered why the hell North America calls it “soccer” as opposed to football, which is what everyone else calls it. “What is a soccer anyway?” Well, friend, I have looked into this one. Apart from … Continue reading

Game 2: The NBA Finals vs. Adam Sandler’s Nips

BOSTON — The NBA Finals began right under my nose. I completely missed Game 1, which probably worked out for the best. I would have been riding a high of excessive hometown pride and may have made a few stupid bets. Owing more money to unsavory con-men isn’t something I need—I already owe Verizon a … Continue reading

The Boston Celtics v. Mole-People Referee Masseuses

Bah. This laziness must be overcome. It’s not like there isn’t anything to write about. For one thing, the Celtics pulled off a 4-2 series win over the Magic. The win is impressive if you were actually nervous the Magic stood a chance to catch up. All the same, Boston did have reason to be anxious. While difficult to pull off, these against the wall rallies have happened, once by Boston (the Sox-Yanks 2004 playoffs, which led to the biggest choke in baseball history) and another to Boston (the Bruins being the Bruins).

Chicken Little and Big Papi: Venuing Red Sox Beat Report

Ortiz is 1 for 11 with a single RBI. The sky is falling, the roof is caving in, the plane has crashed into the mountain. Mike Lowell should take over take over at DH and the once great Ortiz should ride the pine. Please. Baseball is a game that builds on itself. Each pitch is … Continue reading

First Fenway Experience for a Fan of the Enemy

If you haven’t figured it out by now then this is the first article of mine you are reading — I am a Yankees’ fan. As a bit of a stats geek, I pride myself on my objectivity, but even I have tendency to favor the Universe over the Nation in the more arbitrary debates. … Continue reading

Tools of Ignorance: Red Sox Beat Report

Rumors of the death of the Red Sox offense have been greatly exaggerated. Top to bottom this is a line up, while missing boppers like Bay and Manny, is much more balanced throughout the line up. Replacing at bats by Nick Greene, Jason Varitek, and Julio Lugo with Victor Martinez and Marco Scutaro should more … Continue reading

"I Love that Dirty Water": Dueling Red Sox Predictions for 2010

Yesterday, the New York Times, in their infinite wisdom, printed dueling reviews of the new Apple (don’t call us a computer company) iPad. The review was prefaced as a two-parter with the first section addressed to techies — a slam — was followed up with one addressed to those bereft of technical knowledge. The second … Continue reading

AL East is Premium Television

At one point in the last decade HBO had the three best shows on television: The Wire, The Sopranos, and Entourage. If it was Sunday night you were watching HBO. And if you didn’t get the premium channel, then you were at a friend’s house who did. Heck, even Peter Klaven needed special permission from … Continue reading

Patriots Make Bid for [an Orange] Julius, [Stuffed] Peppers – AP reports

As the greater Boston media likes to constantly remind the people of the United States, the New England Patriots may well have the hardest working staff in the National Football League (or as it’s known our many Southern friends: “Fuuht’bawl”). Sometimes the long, cold nights, which blend inevitably into dreary, grey, New England Winter mornings … Continue reading

RIP: Mosi Tatapu plows his last

Reports are coming in that former Patriots go-to guy Mosiula “Mosi” Tatupu has died at the age of 54 in Attleboro, Massachusetts. He played with the Patriots for thirteen seasons as a fullback, special teams guy, and just about anything they asked him to do because he was just that damn good. He was also … Continue reading