Bon Soir, 2010 FIFA World Cup!: Final Power Rankings from South Africa

Sometimes all there is to say is:

Sadface, sadface, sadface!

World…Cup…come…come back! Verily, we hardly knew ye. Hardly. Like comic book shoppe geeks suddenly run out of Fantastic Four serials, “there is no emotocon for what [we] are feeling.” The Venuist hasn’t even been to a sports bar in like, 36 hours and Warning Track Power called out of work with a tummy ache. It’s gotten that bad.

If ‘Crooks weren’t plugging away, we’d probably lose the lease on the blog. Better get this last World Cup recap underway and call it an eon.

Without further ado, your final World Cup Power Rankings:

1. Paul the Octopus [previous – #1]: Sure, you’d think Spain earned its way to the top of the head. WRONG! The Dutch menace represented but an idle threat when compared with Paul’s foe: Mani. The. Parakeet! [note: if you just went ‘dunt dunt DUN’ in your head, that was our intent]. Worst part is, Mani had us going for a sec, seeing as the game wiled into extra time and all. Our bad, dude. Our bad. After all talking birds come and go, a sports-prognosticating Octopus comes along, what, like three, four times in a lifetime?

Bonus: Nothing really here, but isn’t it amazing how ‘vuvuzela’ went from being the only thing folks talked about during week one to a complete non-subject/non-issue by overtime in the finals? It’s like that ginormous white wall of noise we never knew we always wanted.

For the rest of the World Cup power rankings, travel over here.

One Response to “Bon Soir, 2010 FIFA World Cup!: Final Power Rankings from South Africa”
  1. Eric says:

    The Netherlands were a poor, fouling bunch. I mean, sneijder needing to make a game saving tackle in the box late in the game? He had one defense-splitting pass to Robben, but I don’t remember seeing him much other than that.

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