Brazil Ousted by Oranje

This post originally from Venuing Voices.

Brazil’s second best export [for the first see: super models] was sent packing today by the Netherlands in their orange jerseys. Jumping out to an early 1-0 lead, Brazil then gave the Dutch its own equilizer when Felipe Melo headed the ball into his own goal.

“You know, I’m tired,” Melo said after the game. “This has been a really long trip, and I just want to go home. I figured I would expedite the process.”

Later in the match, Melo was red carded for stomping on Arjen Robben’s leg. He was seen on the sidelines shortly after taking a nap.

On the Dutch side of things, Wesley Sneijder scored the winning header, and became the shortest player to score a goal off a header in this World Cup. After the game Sneijder could be seen wandering around the pitch pointing to his forehead and saying to anyone who would listen, “It went off me head.”

A spokespersn for SPOTWO (the Short People Of The World Organization) said, “This is a victory for short people everywhere! You can suck a dick, Randy Newman; we do have a reason to live!”

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