Mets to Build Weather Control Tower for Citi Field

It was the bottom of the 9th Inning, with the Mets trailing by one, and Jason Bay at the plate. With a single swing he sent the ball high and deep into left field. But instead of going out, a strong breeze grabbed the ball and corralled it, keeping it within the confines of the field and limiting Bay to a double. The following batters all struck out, ending the game 6-5 in the Giants’ favor and also ending the Mets’ nine-game winning streak at home.

Minutes after the game ended, Omar Minaya was on the phone with engineers from all over the world looking into what it would take to erect some sort of weather control device. He was quoted earlier today as saying:

This is our home field, and we should have the advantage. If that advantage can be gained by controlling the weather, so be it. It’s all part of the game.

The full application of this weather control device is as of yet unknown. Will the Mets be able to make it rain if they’re ahead after the 5th inning? Or perhaps they will just settle for changing the direction of the winds based on who’s at bat. Bud Selig has yet to give the full okay to the project, but so far he seems to be onboard.

If the Red Sox can have the Green Monster, then I think the Mets should be able to have the weather control tower.

In related news, Theo Epstein has hired bio-engineers to turn the Green Monster into an actual monster. JJ Abrams has supposedly been hired as a consultant.

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