The Devil's Advocate: Joe Mauer Sucks

I know everyone thinks that Joe Mauer is the greatest thing to ever happen to Minnesota…well, he probably is, but that’s besides my point. Mauer, he isn’t as good as everyone thinks he is.

At the age of four Mauer was asked to leave his T-Ball league because he hit the ball too hard for the other kids in the league to handle. He struck out only once in his entire high school career and batted over .500 all four years. He averaged over 20 points a game as a point guard in basketball. And he had a 62% completion percentage with over 3000 passing yards and 41 touchdowns with only 5 interceptions.

Yeah, all of that may sound amazing, but I’ll tell you what it really is: selfish. How do you think the players around him felt? Isn’t it enough to be the star of one team? Why did he feel the need to hog the spotlight so m and not give anyone else a chance? How is it fair that one person gets to date the head cheerleader, the captain of the dance team, and whoever it is that baseball players date? Hell he probably could’ve had the glee club president if he wanted.

So, the next time you’re thinking about singing the praises of Mauer, just remember all of the other kids he had to make look bad in order to make himself look so good. Doesn’t seem like such a nice guy now, does he?

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