NFL Draft Live Article-ing

The NFL Draft is the most important annual non-event on the sports calendar. It barely beats out the likes of Red Bull Flugtag, the Nathan’s Hot Dog Eating Contest, WrestleMania, and the NHL Stanley Cup playoffs. Therefore, to honor the King of Cult Events as it goes primetime for the first time, I will be live article-ing throughout the evening. No, I will not be live blogging. That implies a back-and-forth between you — the reader — and me — the man who has the pedestal and can therefore act as if he is more important than he actually is. Instead, I will be constantly posting new articles here at Voices, recapping past picks and making some bold predictions (see what I did there!). So with about an hour and a half until the festivities begin, let me start with three predictions:

1) Sam Bradford will be the number one overall pick – I know, I went out on a huge limb with that one. Still, I cannot wait to see the soon to be former Sooner as he shakes hands with Commissioner Hitler Goodell. I’ve always thought Bradford had a closet mischievous side. I lack any proof or logic for this. But I wonder if Goodell will be giving Sam the “Whatever you do, do NOT act like Ben” speech.

2) Al Davis will pick Dez Bryant – A super fast and athletic wide receiver with questionable character and huge upside. If that isn’t Silver and Black then I don’t know what is.

3) Mel Kiper Jr. will hit the over on number of death glares shot at Todd McShay (line currently holding at 6.5) – Some of the antagonistic relationships on television are clearly scripted dramas made to boost ratings. Not this one. Mel Kiper goes to sleep every night sticking pins into a mini-McShay voodoo doll. The Hair, who has been with ESPN since the network’s inception, despises pretty boy Todd and his ever increasing presence. At least the WWL is wise enough not to put them on the same set.

See you all at 7:30 PM EST when Venuing’s Voices goes on the clock.

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