It’s kinda like what Jay Leno does, except I’m laughing – Meditations on “KAKA”

This post may cause abdominal distention.

What is life without the pursuit of the puerile?

One of my favorite soccer—ahem—fútbol players is a Brazilian man whose birth name is Ricardo Izecson dos Santos Leite.

Said man is more commonly known as Kaká in the world of soccer. Kaká, as I’ve come to understand, is a Portuguese term of endearment for one named Ricardo. However this particular Kaká got stuck with this nickname for life thanks to his asshole brother, who nicknamed him Caca when he was a youngin’ simply because he couldn’t pronounce his name correctly.

So, why is he my favorite soccer player?

  • Do I know anything about him or his record? No.
  • Did he headbutt an Italian in the middle of a World Cup game? Nay.
  • Has he done anything so outrageous as to warrant space in my brain? Hardly.

What I love are the awesome headlines that Kaká seems to generate with little effort. Here is a small collection of my favorites in no order:

What’s Up Kaka, Ronaldo? (Malay Mail)

Sergio Ramos: Don’t always blame Kaka… (

Spanish Inquisition: Quashing The Criticism Of Kaka (another winner from

And nothing says "Inquisition" quite like this shirt.

Kaka back in action during training (AFP)

Missing Kaka (again, Malay Mail)

Just Inside (okay, okay; this Hamilton Spectator headline doesn’t say Kaka, but the story’s about him.)

T-movement in a decisive stage: Kaka (Express Buzz)

Three winners come from our favorite mind-numbing news organization, CNN:

Kaka Unveiled by Real Madrid

– Real fans go ga-ga over Kaká

– Kaka Madness! (all right, I added that exclamation mark)

Thank you for humoring me, gentle readers. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have some real work to get to…

... like laugh at this tree that looks like it has boobs.

2 Responses to “It’s kinda like what Jay Leno does, except I’m laughing – Meditations on “KAKA””
  1. bobbygee says:

    Kaka is actually a very good person. He is a Christian. When Brasil won the Federations Cup he and his mates all wore I Believe in Jesus underneath their jersey. My wife is Brasilian. I had the same reaction as you Kaka- not good. Yet, he is one of the key players for the brasilians in the world cup.

    • Hank Baron says:

      Oh, I don’t doubt that. I’ve heard from one of my Brazilian friends that he’s a pretty great player. I didn’t mean to be derisive. Just juvenile.

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