LCS – what you missed or didn't miss, but now are killing time procrastinating on the internet, so are now magically (somewhat) curious about: Part 1

 

yankee.stadium4_thumb[1]

Above: "The House that Greed Built," or, alternatively, "Disney Presents - Yankee Stadium!"

 

Yankees, Angels, Phillies, & Dodgers…oh my.

Aiiiiight.

[[editors note: couldn’t help but mention to anyone who would hear how it seemed like each series was a match up of bi-coastal Bloods and Crypts.  Phillies – Bloods, Dodgers – Crypts; Yankees – Crypts, Angels – Bloods.  The Logic here is so rudimentary that I am almost embarrassed on sports nations’ behalf for pointing out (I similarly made the same jokes starting with the Kerry/Bush ’04 election in the form of “Crypt States” and “Blood States” going so far as to call Bush “da numba one Blood,” anyhoo) .  Point is, I am half-convinced that had the Phillies and Angels actually met in the Series they would have simply laid down their swords (see: baseball bats) and trucked off (the West Coast team’s in charge of securing the wip-tastic transport and the East Coast team’s in charge of the tune-selection) on a fantastic voyage of Coolio-esque proportions.  Of course in this scenario, the championship would automagically default to the Yankees, since through revenue-sharing, they probably paid for the damn trophies and rings anyway.]]

So, it comes as no surprise and to great relief that, instead, things went like this: 

Yankees – Angels: “New York” wins in Six

The Angels – oh sweet, sad Angels.  Return ye to fairer climbs.  You come from a place of hope (Souther California) and may thou return thence to waiteth until next year.  But first, Angels fans: T*V told you so.

What, did you say, did The Venuist, in my inestimable wisdom, tell you?  That, your team, like the Red Sox would not hit good pitching when the chips were down.  Of course, I thought this flaw would be exposed sooner (see: the Division Series) but make no mistake, L.A.A. of A. is not preparing to play game 1 of the WORLD SERIES in the shadow of the glorious Disney-made springs of Angels’ Stadium because of this fact.  The Yankees pitchers – they were no better than those of the Sox or Angels.  But their hitters (except for Nick Swisher, who like Chone Figgins-Jason Bay-et al feasts on the weak and the slow and the aged) can mash.  

Jon Lackey and the other dude who’s lefthanded but looks like he’s Jon Lackey’s twin got hung out to dry.  Result: Yankees win despite the fact that Joe Girardi made enough rookie-manager errors (see glossary for terms: micro-,over-, and inexcusably stupid).

The Bronx Bombers – Am I impressed with the Yankees performance?  I give a qualified “yes.”  What qualification is that, you ask?  The 2009 Yankees impress me in the way the Apollo program impresses me when I read about it.  After getting out-classed and outsmarted for a few years by the Red Menace, er, I mean the Red Sox, John Kennedy, er, Brian Cashman decided to get all nasty and stop screwing around in the Space Race, er, Pennant Race.  So he hired every mercenary (see: ex-Nazis, A-Rod) and Congress, er the Steinbrenners, threw every dollar they could find in the treasury until they bought their way to the surface of the moon, er, the World Series in under five years.  Great job.  Impressive even.  But it’s not like they did it all on a wing and a prayer and didn’t have a disaster or two along the way (see: Apollo 7, er  Carl Pavano’s Contract).  At least, Post War America, er, I mean, the Tri-State Area finally has a home team it can speak of in proud terms.

 

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